It's hard to take your own advice. I always tell my friends, "this too shall pass..." but it's hard to live by those words when something affects you personally.
It's a scary world out there. I never thought I would have to live through half of the things I've witnessed or experienced. I never thought I would have to worry about my job or paying bills or making it through each day in one piece.
My firm announced today that they are restructuring and downsizing. They made it through the entire summer - when every other law firm in the city was downsizing - and now they decide to downsize and cut costs. For the first time ever, I'm scared for my job and myself. I'm scared of losing my job and having to move home. I'm scared of losing my job and not being able to find another one for months... or even years. I'm scared of not making it through the day.
I'm trying to figure out what my next step is. I hate the feeling of going into work every day, wondering when I'll get cut. I want some kind of reassurance in all of this, but as they have said, several times today, there's no guarantee.
So now I'm looking for another job. I don't want to, but maybe I need to take this as a good sign. I've been contemplating looking for another job lately, even though I've only been at my firm for a year. I just feel like I'm settling for this job because I'm making good money where I can live a comfortable lifestyle. I'm looking at some Marketing positions. Even though my degree is in Sociology, I have two years of Marketing and Event Planning experience just by working with my non-profit. I suppose one could consider it "entry level" experience, at best.
It's funny - I never thought my life would turn to this. I never thought I would enjoy the Marketing field more than the legal field. I always thought marketing was all advertising. Now I realize it's so much more than that. Perhaps I have chosen the wrong field all along. I'm trying to find myself in this crazy, mixed up world but maybe I'm going about it all wrong. Maybe I'm spending too much time trying to "find" myself, and I should just let it happen. I should just "go with the flow" and take things as they come. One thing is for sure, I really do enjoy working with my non-profit. I really do enjoy planning events, working with sponsors, vendors and the media. I love making a difference in this world, despite how big or small that difference may be.
I just wish it didn't take me this long to figure it all out.
Oh I've felt that fire and I've been burned
But I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned
I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned.
But I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned
I wouldn't trade the pain for what I've learned.
Logging you in...
It's not a new idea, but I recently heard "Luck is where preparation meets opportunity," and I can not get that out of my head.
ReplyDeleteI'm not saying this is luck or anything, but the fact that you're even considering the ideas of other careers and paths... well, you're at least preparing for a change. Don't force it, but don't run from it.
Excited to find where these new roads lead you!
I still suck at taking my own advice, but I'm better at realizing it now than I ever was. It's so EASY to give advice.
ReplyDeleteRemember that the 'this long' you're referring to hasn't been that long at all. You're young. You're at the age where you're supposed to be making these kinds of realizations. You should be proud that you're coming into your own, and not hiding from the world.
It's hard to take your own advice that you give out. When someone is navigating a breakup, I'm on top of it. When someone is having a hard time making sense of a relationship, I'm on it. But when it comes to my own well-being or questions or emotions, I'm stupid.
ReplyDeleteTake some advice that a very disgusting, hobag told me. :)
"This too shall pass...."