MY BATTLE

You always remember those moments that change your life - you will always remember what you were doing and how you felt.  You will always remember that you can't take those moments back - so you accept the change and keep pushing forward, despite how hard it will be.

I remember that moment like it was yesterday....

I was 23 years old, settling into a new(ish) city, a good job and spending whatever free time I had with friends or playing sports.  I received a phone call from my gynecologist a couple days after getting my annual exam. 

"We found abnormal cells in your cervix,"

My heart raced.

"But don't worry, I'm sure it's nothing.  We get a lot of abnormal paps that don't turn into anything."

Frankly, I had no idea what she meant by "turn into anything."  But I didn't really think twice about what she said, so I continued with my day like it was any other.  A few hours later, I received another phone call from my gynecologist.

"You have Stage IIA cervical cancer."

I dropped my cell phone the moment I heard that and tears started pouring down my face.  Cancer was all I heard.  And it was enough to send me into tears.

The next day I went to see an oncologist.  He recommended I get a hysterectomy.  I wanted to know how the hell I got this.  He told me I had contracted a sexually transmitted disease - HPV.  I had no idea what HPV was, except that it stood for Human Papillomavirus. 

HPV is the most common sexually transmitted disease in the U.S.  80% of all sexually active women will test positive for HPV by age 50, and while most cases of HPV go away on their own, when it doesn't, it can turn into genital warts or cervical cancer.  Mine turned into cervical cancer, and not over a few years, but over a few short months.  That's the thing about HPV - all it takes is one time, one guy, one girl. 

I told my oncologist that I wasn't ready to give up the option of bearing children.  I was 23 and planned to have kids of my own one day.  So I started radiation treatments - every day for six months.  Then it was every other day for six more months.  The treatments did a toll on my body.  I have never been that sick in my life - nausea, vomiting, fatigue.  Most days I was too weak to even get out of bed, let alone go to work or run at the gym. 

When I found out the radiation wasn't working well enough, I started chemotherapy treatments.  Those were even worse.  I started losing my hair and that's when I became even more self conscious about myself.  No guy wants to date a bald woman.  To the outsider I looked like a normal, pretty woman, but to myself I looked sick and disgusting.  Those were the moments when I started giving up on myself and realizing that living through something like this just wasn't worth it.  I had officially sunk to my absolute lowest point in life (and cancer treatments).

But through all of the emotional and physical pain I went through, I finally beat my cancer and I am now in remission.  I beat cancer.  God, that feels so good to say. 

Now, I'm taking the steps to eradicate this preventable disease.  Over 4,000 women die from cervical cancer each year. 

Looking back, I wish I had known more about HPV and cervical cancer.  But I can't continue looking back on my life - a life I almost lost to cancer.  I have to look forward to all of the wonderful things that lie ahead of me.  I have to do whatever I can to save women's lives from this deadly disease.

My best friend and I started a non-profit organization, Run 2 Inspire, one year after my diagnosis because we both truly believe that no other woman should EVER have to suffer the emotional and physical pain that I went through.  We may be small, but we're large in raising awareness.  And we will make a difference and help educate men and women. 

We're saving women's lives.  Your life could be next.